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Written by Matthew Toomey

Created: 18 July 2006

In most “cop” movies, razor sharp detectives solve crimes and capture criminals with enthusiastic fervour.  This is not the case in 16 Blocks.  Police officer Jack Mosley (Willis) is a tired, forlorn figure who has no passion whatsoever.  He mumbles when he speaks, he walks with a limp and he goes about his day as if every task is a laborious chore.  Jack was once a high profile cop but those days are long behind him.

At his precinct, Jack has little respect.  He’s continually given dead-end assignments by his boss and the latest sees him escorting a petty criminal from his jail cell to the courthouse.  The prisoner’s name is Eddie Bunker (Def) and he is required as a witness at a separate court hearing.

On leaving the station, Jack learns that Eddie is no ordinary person and that this is no ordinary assignment.  In two hours time, Eddie is scheduled to testify against Frank Nugent (Morse), Jack’s former partner and one of the most corrupt police officers in the force.  If you can connect the dots, you’ll realise where this is heading.  Frank has no intention of letting Eddie speak and will use his goons to ensure Jack’s passenger never reaches his destination.

There is one flaw in Frank’s plan and his name is Jack Mosley.  Awoken from years of slumber, Jack takes a surprising stand against the corruption which has engulfed his profession.  He will put his life on the line to get Eddie to the courthouse on time.

Bruce Willis has been well cast in a role which makes good use of his raspy voice.  His sickly appearance and lack of interest made me appreciate my own life a little more.  The weakest link is actor David Morse (The Green Mile) who has nothing to work with as the stereotypical bad guy.  His character is always popping up at the right time and speaks with thoughtless confidence.

It’s a moderately interesting premise but when you break it down, 16 Blocks is a stock-standard thriller which takes few chances.  Every time Jack and Eddie find themselves trapped with seemingly no way of escaping, they find a way out.  If you think it’s possible to “make your own luck”, you might believe their story.  If you don’t, you’ll be frustrated by the many close shaves.

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Written by Matthew Toomey

Created: 06 July 2006

I couldn’t believe that it’s been three years since the release of Pirates Of The Caribbean: The Curse Of The Black Pearl.  It made a staggering $653m (in U.S. dollars) around the world and it earned Johnny Depp his very first Academy Award nomination.  Not bad for a movie based on a ride at Disneyland!

Following the success of the first flick, Walt Disney Pictures opened their cheque book and commissioned two sequels.  The third instalment, which is being shot at the moment, is slated for release in May 2007.

If you can remember the original film, Will Turner (Bloom) and Elizabeth Swann (Knightley) helped Captain Jack Sparrow (Depp) break out from prison so that he could reclaim his boat, The Black Pearl.  Dead Man’s Chest opens with Will and Elizabeth being arrested for their involvement in the escape.

There’s an ulterior motive behind their arrest however.  The influential Cutler Beckett (Hollander) will offer them a pardon but only if Will can track down Captain Jack.  There’s a unique compass that Jack keeps with him and Cutler wants to get his hands on it.

Across the oceans, Captain Jack is having his own problems.  Buried on a remote island is a treasure chest that contains a valuable secret.  He knows how to find it but he does not have the special key with which to open it.  The man who does is Davy Jones (Nighy), the slimy ghoul who captains the Flying Dutchman.  Davy won’t let go of his prized possession without a fight and so it’s up to Captain Jack to come up with a creative plan if he’s going to steal it…

The opening of Pirates Of The Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest is a complete waste.  You could walk in an hour after the movie has started and be no worse off.  Too much time is spent trying to develop the characters and the overly complicated plot.  If you can get through the lengthy introduction though, you’ll find the film does improve.  The action-packed finale sees Captain Jack and Davy Jones engage in an epic battle.  There’s an over-reliance on visual effects (some look a bit fake) but it’s still great to watch on a big screen.

Every laugh in the film is provided by Johnny Depp.  You never know what is going to come out of his mouth next.  Depp has based his character’s eccentric personality on Rolling Stones star Keith Richards and recent news reports have stated that Richards will make a cameo in the third film.  Apart from Depp, the cast are ordinary.  Orlando Bloom has more screen time but does little with it.  Keira Knightley is particularly disappointing in what is a smaller role.

Without revealing too much, I was frustrated by the ending.  Many questions are left unanswered.  It’s obvious that the filmmakers want you to come back in twelve months time and pay more money to see what happens next.  Don’t you just hate that?

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Written by Matthew Toomey

Created: 16 July 2006

Swiss couple Carola (Hoss) and Stefan (Rieke) have travelled to Kenya for a two week holiday.  On the last day of their trip, Carola meets a Kenyan native named Lemalian (Ido).  From the moment their eyes first meet, the two develop a connection.  Within 24 hours, Carola has given up on her marriage with Stefan and gone to live with Lemalian.  She doesn’t know if it’s true love or a moment of madness.

Lemalian is from a Kenyan tribe known as the maasai.  He lives with his people in a small community which is far civilisation.  There is no electricity, no running water and little in the way of edible food.  It’s a difficult transition for Carola who has left behind a loving family and a successful job back in Switzerland.  Now, she finds herself unemployed and the only white woman in a small tribe of people who are questioning her appearance.  Can a woman give up everything in the name of love?  Only time will tell.

Based on the autobiographical novel by Corinne Hofmann, The White Masai has been brought to the screen by German director Hermine Huntgeburth.  The Kenyan landscape makes for a beautiful setting but it was a difficult shoot for the cast and crew.  They battled sweltering heat during the day and slept in small tents each night.

I’m not sure if I’m supposed to feel this way but Carola was a very annoying character.  She’s in an unfamiliar world and yet she speaks and acts as if she knows all the answers.  Carola objects to many traditions within the Masai tribe but I what right does she have to criticise?  Those who see it differently will probably enjoy the film more than I did.

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Written by Matthew Toomey

Created: 29 June 2006

Given the high cost of making a film, planning is paramount.  You have to make sure that the lead actors will be available at the time you wish to shoot.  You have to get copyright clearances when using any identifiable product or song.  You have to provide a budget to the investors to show how ever dollar will be spent.  It’s all done so that the development of the film runs as smoothly and efficiently as possible.

Sometimes though, it all goes wrong.  Shot in New Zealand, production was shut down mid-way through the shoot when star Samantha Morton came down with severe influenza.  When the cast and crew returned three months later to resume, they learned that director Vincent Ward (What Dreams May Come) had pulled out.  Cinematographer Alun Bollinger (The Frighteners) had to step in to complete the shoot.  Ward was reinstated during the post-production and you’ll see his name in the opening credits as the official director.

There were other problems too.  Inclement weather made the shoot more difficult than expected.  Samantha Morton was rumoured to have acted like a “diva” on set which annoyed fellow actors and Ward himself.  Co-star Cliff Curtis was injured when he crashed his car into a house.  The insurers of the film can’t have been happy.

So has the cast and crew overcome these many obstacles?  The answer is no.  River Queen is a terribly disappointing film.  It looks like it wants to be a grand epic but the weak story generated no emotion whatsoever.  Its characters are dreary and I couldn’t care less what became of them.  The production problems are clearly evident.

To quickly cover the plot, River Queen is set in New Zealand in the 1860s.  Britain is trying to colonize the country but is facing opposition from the Maoris.  Irish woman Sarah O’Brien (Morton) has come to New Zealand with her father to help establish the new British colony.  Whilst there, she falls in love with a Maori local and gives birth to a son.  As tensions escalate between the British and the Maoris, Sarah’s son is kidnapped by his paternal grandfather so that he can be raised as a traditional Maori.  Sarah then begins an agonisingly long search to find and reclaim her only son.

At the film’s New Zealand premiere in January 2006, Vincent Ward said of the film “you'll either love it or you'll hate it.”  I've got my answer.

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Written by Matthew Toomey

Created: 09 July 2006

A thirty something year old photographer named Jeff (Wilson) has befriended a 14-year-old girl named Hayley (Page) in an internet chat-room.  The two agree to meet for the first time at a nearby coffee shop.  On Hayley’s insistence, the pair head back to Jeff’s house and you’ll start to fear for her safety.

Very few films have dealt with the issue of paedophilia.  Mysterious Skin, which was released last year, is one of the few good examples.  After watching the above introduction, I thought Hard Candy would be an interesting movie.  I was certain that it would explore the delicate subject matter and give the audience plenty to think about.  How wrong I was.

Without spoiling too much, Hayley gets the upper hand and takes control of the situation.  She has been playing Jeff and wants to punish him for what he is trying to do.  This makes the film utterly ridiculous.  If you’d like some more adjectives, try implausible, silly and farcical.

I have never met a 14-year-old person who speaks and thinks so intelligently.  For most of the film, she is incredibly calm.  Not only does she defeat Jeff mentally, she also overpowers him physically is some scenes.  How is this remotely possible?

The bottom line is that instead of a serious film about paedophilia, we are forced to watch a lame revenge flick.  What’s the point?  Will people feel better watching a paedophile get what he deserves?  Shouldn’t we be equally worried about the 14-year-old psychopath?  The ending itself makes no sense.  I’d love to see what happened after the final scene because it wouldn’t be as clear cut as the ending implies.

In case you’re wondering, the actress who plays Hayley is of legal age.  She’s 19-year-old Ellen Page and you might remember her from the recent X-Men: The Last Stand.   Jeff is played by Patrick Wilson who was last seen in The Phantom Of The Opera.  They “dominate” the film with only three other people listed in the closing credits.

Hard Candy is rated R in Australia for its high level sexual themes and high level violence.  This will prevent anyone under the age of 18 from seeing it.  If you’re over 18, you’ll need to use your own willpower to stay away.