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Written by Matthew Toomey

Created: 13 April 2006

The World’s Fastest Indian is one the most likeable feel-good movies in recent memory.  It’s a film you can recommend to any person of any age.  I would be very surprised if you didn’t walk out with a beaming smile on your face.

Writer-director Roger Donaldson (Cocktail, Thirteen Days) has brought to the screen the true life story of Burt Munro.  We pick up Burt’s story at his home in Invercargill, New Zealand in the year 1967.  The 60-something year old Burt always had a love for motorcycles and for speed.  He had purchased a 1920 Indian motorcycle many years ago and it has been a work in progress for him ever since.  Riding on the nearby sandy beach, Burt’s objectives was to always to go faster.

Thinking his bike could be improved no further, Burt decided it was time to fulfil a lifelong dream.  He mortgaged his house and used the money to travel to Salt Lake in Utah, home to the Bonneville Salt Flats.  Each year, the Flats hosted an event known as Speed Week, where the fastest contraptions from around the country competed to set new world land-speed records.

The film follows Burt’s journey from New Zealand to Salt Lake and an assortment of people he meets along the way.  He may be showing his age but Burt’s an intelligent individual whose enthusiasm rubs off on everyone he meets.  He will go through much adversity trying to make it to the competition but with the help of complete strangers, he finds a way.  It gives you plenty of faith in the human race and the film reminds me very much of The Straight Story (about an elderly man who drove his ride-on mower across America).

Anthony Hopkins is utterly brilliant in the leading role.  He may be one of the greatest actors of the modern era but even I was surprised at how well he delivers a Kiwi accent.  His mannerisms and demeanour are also ideal.  Hopkins is the only feature member of the cast but you will spot a few other recognisable actors along the way (such as Bruce Greenwood and Diane Ladd) who make memorable cameos.

The film has received a very low key release in these jam-packed school holidays so make sure you don’t miss the chance to see it.  I’m still feeling good from it.

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Written by Matthew Toomey

Created: 08 April 2006

The mammoth named Manny (Romano), the sloth named Sid (Leguizamo) and the tiger named Diego (Leary) have returned for another animated adventure.  This time, their Antarctic habitat is in danger of flooding due to the effects of global warming.  Tipped off by a “friendly” vulture, they begin a long march to find a boat which will take them to safety.  There is no time to waste.

On their journey, they meet another mammoth named Ellie (Latifah).  This is a huge relief for Manny who thought he might have been the last mammoth left.  Also joining them are two mischievous possums named Crash (Scott) and Eddie (Peck) who will have their own parts to play.

Intertwined throughout the film is a funny story about a squirrel trying to eat an acorn.  Have you seen the film’s trailer?  If so, you’ll know exactly what I’m talking about.  This unlucky squirrel is the best part of Ice Age: The Meltdown and generated the most vocal response from the kids and adults at the screening I attended.

The rest of the film is so-so.  There are a few jokes to chuckle over but the storyline doesn’t offer much in the way of interest.  Kids may see it differently but as a full-price paying adult (who wasn’t tempted to by a plush Ice Age toy at the ticket counter), I expected more from this big animated blockbuster.

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Written by Matthew Toomey

Created: 13 April 2006

It’s not often that we reach the 4^th movie in a series.  Harry Potter is the only recent example I can think of.  The Scary Movie “trilogy” hasn’t gotten this far as a result of its quality.  Rather, it’s the fact that more and more bad movies have been made and the temptation to spoof these films is too hard to resist.

This time around, the films under the microscope include War Of The Worlds, The Village, Saw, The Grudge, Million Dollar Baby and Brokeback Mountain.  There are also some parodies of George W. Bush and Tom Cruise which will be enjoyed by many.

This type of film is nothing new and it’s safe to say it won’t be winning any Oscars next year.  That said, it will tickle your funny bone on occasions.  It’s nice to sit back and enjoy a simple “popcorn movie” which doesn’t require any thought whatsoever.

Disappointingly, the film only spoofs a small number of recently Hollywood releases.  I can think of many more films which deserve a roasting (particularly in the romantic genre).  If they had of mixed Scary Movie 4 with the recently released Date Movie, then we might have had a film with more substance and more laughs.

My all-time favourite spoof comedy is Flying High (known in America as Airplane!) which was first released in 1980.  I’m always recommending it and if you haven’t seen it, please do so!  Both Scary Movie 4 and Flying High were directed by David Zucker and you can see his sense of humour hasn’t changed.  He doesn’t have as much material to work with but he still manages to weave it some great one-liners.  Other Zucker films include the first two Naked Gun movies and Scary Movie 3.

The Scary Movie series isn’t deteriorating at the same rate of say, the Police Academy series, but you have to wonder if there’s enough jokes left in the bag for a fifth edition.

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Written by Matthew Toomey

Created: 06 April 2006

Al (Bradshaw) and Sue (Bates) want their son Tripp (McConaughey) out of the house.  He’s lived at home for over thirty years and they think it’s about time he found a place of his own.  Personally, I don’t know why they don’t just ask him to leave or simply kick him out?  Instead, they hire an interventionist named Paula (Parker) to persuade him.  She can’t have been cheap!

Paula’s plan is to simulate a relationship with Tripp.  This will give him self-confidence and will hopefully create a desire to move out and become more independent.  Paula admits that she has been successful with this technique many times before so I’d like to ask, what happened to the other guys?  Did she go out with them, lead them along, get them to move out, and then dump them for some made-up reason?  It’s awfully strange if you ask me.

Anyway, Tripp is going to prove a lot more challenging than Paula thought.  Firstly, he has a fear of commitment.  The idea of steady girlfriend (as opposed to a series of one night stands) is something he isn’t interested in.  Secondly and most importantly, Paula starts falling for Tripp and as the rule goes, you should never mix business and pleasure.

As you pay have picked up from my cynicism, there are a hundred things wrong with this premise.  If you stand back and look at the story from a distance, it doesn’t make much sense.  It is all structured around the predictable “boy gets girl, boy loses girl, boy gets girl” formula.  Lovers of romantic comedies with disagree with my misgivings but I don’t care.  Surely they could have written a more believable tale?

The casting of Matthew McConaughey reminded me of his turn in the 2003 romantic comedy, How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days.  I was critical of that film too but I had many friends who disagreed and enjoyed the silliness of the story.

Failure To Launch isn’t as bad and I believe it’s due to the casting of Sarah Jessica Parker.  She’s good along McConaughey but she’s even better alongside Zooey Deschanel, who plays her sarcastic roommate in the movie.  This is the second time I’ve praised Parker this year (after The Family Stone) and it’s reaffirming my belief that she’s one of the best actresses of the moment.

I’ve seen worse but I’ve also seen many which are much better.

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Written by Matthew Toomey

Created: 09 April 2006

Viola (Bynes) is upset to hear that the women’s soccer program at her school has been canned due to a lack of interest.  She tries training with the men’s team but their coach objects strongly to the idea.  He thinks women are too slow and lack the physicality to play soccer at a high level.  So what does Viola do?  You wouldn’t believe me if I told you but I’m going to try anyway…

Viola’s twin brother, Sebastian (Kirk), is sneaking out of the house to go to London for two weeks.  He’s part of band which has been invited to play at a musical festival.  Their separated parents know nothing of this and Sebastian asks Viola to cover for him.  I’ve heard of sneaking out at night but how the hell do you get away with sneaking out for two weeks???

Anyway, Sebastian had recently enrolled at an upper-class boarding school which just so happens to have a top men’s soccer team.  Viola’s plan is to dress up as Sebastian, take his place at College and then make the men’s soccer team.  This will prove she’s as good as the boys.

Viola’s scheme starts unravelling when she meets her roommate, a “hunk” named Duke (Tatum).  She starts falling for Duke but of course she can’t reveal these feelings because he thinks she’s a guy.  To explain the other complications in this story, I’m going to steal the tagline from the film’s poster – “Duke wants Olivia who likes Sebastian who is really Viola whose brother is dating Monique so she hates Olivia who's with Duke to make Sebastian jealous who is really Viola who's crushing on Duke who thinks she's a guy…”  Confused?

When I walked out of this film, I didn’t know whether to give this film an average grade or the worst possible grade.  Amanda Bynes is horribly unconvincing when trying to look like a guy.  This fact, coupled with the far-fetched script, will some people thinking that this is as bad as cinema gets.  I won’t argue with them.

However, I believe the film is so bad, that it actually becomes good again.  Does that make any sense?  I was squirming in my seat whilst watching Bynes deliver her lines and that’s unusual for me.  When a movie is bad, I usually just sit silently in disgust.  She’s The Man got under my skin and I was entertained by its awfulness.  You’d think I was talking about an Ed Wood film!

Providing further hilarity was the review of the film on last Wednesday night’s episode of At The Movies on the ABC.  After Margaret Pomeranz gave it a positive review, David Stratton responded with “It's so puerile, Margaret. It is so awful”.  Margaret shot back with “Do you know, what does that say about me? Don't answer that question.”

The film is loosely based on the William Shakespeare play, Twelfth Night.  I say that as a passing comment because it should have no effect whatsoever on your decision to see this film.  All I can suggest is that you consult your doctor first to ensure there will be no mind-numbing side-effects.  Me finish now.